Are you wondering if there are things you can do before going to couples counseling?
The answer is, Yes!
Couples counseling is often for those that have years of rehearsed conflict or contempt that keep them stuck in a negative disconnect cycle. But if that isn’t you, here are some things that are basic to rebuilding and renewing your marriage.
Here is some inspiration for you on preventing divorce.
- Stop Reacting, Start Listening. Listening is difficult for most people. We often begin formulating a defense while the other is talking. We can reach emotionally, verbally, and physically (rolling eyes, tensing, or other nonverbals). And what is difficult is that these can become habit. To truly listen, we need to be in a state of relative calm. Take a look at this FREE Video Series that introduces you to a powerful listening technique.
- Practice Listening. Changing relational habits are difficult. Change takes practice. Here is a FREE Imago Dialogue Guide that you can each print out and use as you practice an ‘Appreciation Dialogue’ as demonstrated in the video series above.
- Give Grace. Applying what you’ve learned in the video series and the dialogue practice in everyday life with your spouse will help you on your way to a new marriage, a new way of life. Change is difficult and we give each other grace. When conflict tests our new skills, be sure give each other a portion of the grace you have received from above.